Wow I didn't realize it has been over a week since I blogged.  I was reading my last entry about getting in touch with the nutrition clinic on post and I did hear back from them but they don't have a group meeting where I can go.  So for now I will just keep doing what I am doing at home.

This past Sunday I weighed and had lost 4 pounds and was so surprised at that.  I truly didn't think I had lost anything, in fact, I thought I had gained.  Boy was I surprised at the results.  Over this past week or so I have really gotten more active and not just sitting around.  I was so good at the beginning back in January and then I hit a low point where I gained 6 pounds in 2 weeks and I was really feeling sorry for myself.  I felt like such a loser.  But I picked myself up, wiped myself off and started all over again and it paid off...down 4 pounds.  I am now back down to 491 pounds and that is 11 pounds from where I started. 

As you know I bought the food saver thingy and made up some meals, portioned them out into individual bags and put them in the freezer.  This past week it has really paid off in making supper for myself.  All I had to do was put the main course in the microwave to heat up and while it was doing that I made a vegetable, salad or pasta to go with it.  Then when it came time to record my points it was SO MUCH EASIER.  I recommend getting a food saver to anyone who struggles with supper meals.  Make up some meals ahead of time and then on a night when you don't have time to cook you just have to reheat.

On Friday night I put the pork tenderloin in the crock pot with the BBQ sauce and it cooked all night so when we got up Saturday morning all I had to do was portion it out and freeze what we wouldn't eat right away.  That way we don't get tired of a particular food (from eating it 4 days in a row) and we can get more variety in our meals. 

I got a compliment from my husband on Friday.  He dropped me off to mail a package and when I was done I had to wait for him to come pick me up.  When he arrived he told me that I looked great.  I had what he meant and he said I looked skinner and I was standing up.  This just made my day.  For people who are fat like me standing and not leaning on sitting down is hard to do and standing straight is even harder.  I have really been working on standing, forcing myself to stand to do stuff.  It seems to be paying off.  This past week has just been wonderful.  I found myself doing more and being more active and not really thinking about it...I JUST DID IT.  My husband would say, do you realize you just did such and such and I went no.  Shocked us both.  So I am finding myself doing stuff that before I either wouldn't do or would struggle to do and now am just doing it.

I have taken on the job of gathering up the trash on Monday nights for Bill while he is at school and then all he has to do it put it out before going to bed.  Some may say, what's so hard about that, but there again I had been so used to just sitting and not doing anything that just that simple job was hard.  It can still be a struggle sometimes but I work through it and just tell myself that I AM GOING TO DO THIS NO MATTER WHAT.  That is my motto or goal....I AM GOING TO DO THIS NO MATTER WHAT.

I have 2 1/2 months before my mother-in-law gets here and we go sight seeing.  I still have a ways to go before I can do much walking with her but I am determined to get there.  Please continue to pray for me and my daily struggles.  If I can push through the daily routines then I will be successful in the long run.  Until later...K

I just read an article on the Fort Hood web page about a lady who weighed 285 pounds.  She wanted to have Lap Band surgery but her husband did some research about the side effects and how she would have to change her eating habits after she had it.  So she decided to hold off and get in touch with Darnall Nutrition Services at the hospital and she is so glad that she did.  She has lost 45 pounds in 10 months and won't be having the surgery.  They have taught her how to chose right foods to eat and the correct portion sizes.  I was so moved by the story that I emailed the person who wrote the story asking them to get many the information of the Nutrition Center so I could contact them.  I thought I could do this with just the online version of weight watchers but I really think I need to have a face to face with someone or a group each week.  I can't afford the weight watchers meetings so I am hoping that the center on post will see retired family members.  I also am hoping that that person will ge back in touch with me with the info.

I feel like such a failure.  I thought I was so committed to this but as my mom pointed out I am just not there yet...and she is right.  If I was truly committed I wouldn't have gained 4 pounds this past week.  I would be pushing myself harder to get this weight off. 

I'll let you know what happens in the next couple of days.  It will be a struggle to go to the hospital.  You have to park SO FAR AWAY from the building and walking is not easy for me.  And I am not one who like to get out of my comfort zone and this will most certainly get me out of it.  If I can't do this then I will have to do the weight watchers meetings but one way or the other I am going to push myself.

Thanks all...Later K

Good morning one and all.  It wasn't such a good week for me.  I guess I tried to tell myself that I was eating right and watching my points but the scale had something else to say and I ended up gaining 4 pounds this week.  You can fool yourself but you can't fool the scale...lol

I don't know why I have such an obession with food.  At times it seems that is all I think about...food, food, food.  Some days it seems like I am always hungry and that is what is was like this past week.

I did make up a bunch of meals for this week and freeze them in individual portion sizes with the seal a meal.  So this week when Bill goes to school at night I am ready for supper.  He will be driving this week so I won't have the truck accessible to run out and get fast food.  Not having the truck around will be a nice thing.

I thought I was doing 'just enough' exercise this week but there again the scale said otherwise.  Even Bill, who worked his behind off this week ended up gaining this past week.  Maybe it's in the water...lol NOT

I look back on what I ate this week and I didn't really keep track writing it down but in my mind I can see that we ate pizza 2 different times, had that cookie dessert thing, ate out 2 different times and I am sure there are other times that I can't remember off the top of my head that wasn't healthy.  Just don't a good week for either of us.

Well time for breakfast.  Gonna have a bowl of cereal and a yogurt.  Take care one and all...Later

So the other night I made honey glazed pork chops, frozen corn and chicken flavored noodles from one of those packets.  Its was DELICIOUS and we have left overs.  I will certainly be making this again and again.

Today we bought a food saver vacuum sealer and I am so excited to use it.  I had lots of leftover food that I put in the freezer but tomorrow I am gonna separate them out and put it in the baggies that came with the food saver.  Then when Bill comes home for lunch all I have to do is put in the microwave or boiling water to heat it up.  I will also set myself up with meals for supper so hopefully it will make it easier for eating at nights when Bill is gone.

I made a dessert cookie the other day too and tomorrow I am gonna divide it up, seal a serving in a baggie and put them in the freezer.  Then I will throw one in Bill's supper at night when he goes to school.  What a nice treat for him. 

It's been a good week eating wise.  I have kept on my points but I haven't exercised a lot.  At least not exercising my usual stuff.  I have been working around the house with Bill and getting some exercise that way.  We decided today we aren't as young as we used to be and by evening we were so tired we just sat and watched tv.  Tomorrow I have a lot to do and I hope it will be a good day and not have a lot fo aches and pains.  Spring break is almost over.

Bill got the pool all drained and cleaned up and it's refilling.  Tomorrow he will hit it with the chemicals and hopefully it will warm up by April or May so we can start swimming.  I can't wait.  I feel so much better after we have worked out in the pool.  Last year Bill came up with some exercises I can do in the pool to build my strength and it worked.  Unfortunately I lost it all through the winter.  I have to come up with something in the winter to keep up my strength and not gain weight.  I am praying that by winter time I have lost enough weight that I can fit into a swimming suit and then go to the local swimming pool to do water aerobics.

So looking forward to more nice weather.  I seem to want to get up and do more stuff when the weather is nice.  I can open the windows and get fresh air and it just makes me feel better.  When I feel better I don't like sitting around doing nothing.  So here's to nicer weather and windows open.

I am headed to bed.  Night all.  Hope you are having fun reading my blog.  I appreciate and love the support and prayers.  Until later...K

I discovered that you can use Laughing Cow Light Garlic & Herb as a substitue for mayo on a sandwich.  It is really good and only 1 point.  The mayo is 3 points for 1 T and it usually takes 1 1/2 T per sandwich.  Yesterday for lunch I tried the 1 wedge (only 1 point) and it was enough for the sandwich but more importantly it was delicious so I think I am gonna start doing that.  Bill doesn't want it but that's ok.

Yesterday was a good day moving around and stuff.  I got the kitchen all picked up, dishes done, trash gathered up.  I did several loads of laundry (didn't get them folded yet) and picked up the living room.  Today has been another story.  It just hurts so bad to move and I don't understand why.  My knees hurt so bad that just sitting they still ache.  Didn't get anything done today (I was only home in the morning).  In the afternoon we had to run to Home Depot in Temple and we were gone for about 4 hours so I think I will take at easy tonight and try tomorrow to get the rest of the laundry folded and put away.

Bill took me to Fozolis' cause he felt bad making me wait around in Home Depot for him.  I was talking to him about how I felt.  Why do I hurt so much.  Why do I have fantasticly wonderful days and other days I can hardly move.  I thought it was the weather but we have no cold fronts coming through, nothing like that is changing today so I just don't understand.  I just would love to have a week of no pain, no aches and get so much done.

Well I am gonna go for now and get some rest.  Praying for a good day tomorrow.  Catch you all later...K

It's Sunday and weigh in day.  Unfortunately this past week has not been nice to me and I gained 2 pounds.  I really thought it was gonna be more so I am happy with only 2 pounds.  I wish it had been in the other direction but I was not good at watching what I ate and not exercising.  It was just a bad week all in all.  But today was good and I am back on track.  Bill is off this week for spring break and he will help me. 

I made several meals to have during the week so I won't be struggling to fine something to eat or wanting to go out to eat.  We did go out Friday night but I had steak and a sweet potato.  I only ate half of my meal and the rest I ate the next day.  Cut up the steak in a chef's salad but didn't eat the sweet potato.  The salad was really good but the sweet potato didn't heat up well.

In June my mother-in-law is coming for a visit with my sister-in-law and nephew.  We will meet them in San Antonio at the train station and spend the night.  The next day we are gonna do some sight seeing around there.  When I think about sight seeing my stomach gets in a knot and I get sick.  It is so frightening to me all that walking and stuff.  I am really scared I am gonna let down everyone.  I want to just go and sit on a bench and let the rest of them go about their day but then I miss out on so much.  I tell everyone it's ok I am fine with this but my heart is sad.  I miss out on so much being this big.  It just doesn't feel like it is ever gonna end.  I am crying just thinking about it.  Guess I will change the subject and just tell myself it will be ok.

Bill started draining the pool today and getting it ready for the summer.  Can't wait until we can go swimming.  It's the only place on this planet that I can move around without hurting.  The water is so nice to fat people.  Can you imagine what a whale would feel like on dry land.  No wonder they are in the ocean.  I feel right at home in the water....lol

Tomorrow it's suppose to be the only day that is nice this whole week so we are gonna tackle the grass and also work on straightening up the garage.  Wish me luck.  I am gonna try and help Bill mow the grass and see how well I do.  I am looking forward to it.

I have had several people ask me how I can eat such and such cause it has so many calories.  You can eat anything you want BUT you have to stay within your points.  My friend Dora said to me tonight, you can have that BIG slice of cake and a small salad.  Now grant it you won't feel full if you do that but as long as you stay within your points you can.  I would not do THAT but I do allow myself to have sweets once in a while.  Except for last week when I didn't really watch what I ate I am trying to eat better.  The thing about weight watchers is they teach you how to eat from all the food groups.  It teachers you not to deprive yourself of your favorites but to figure out how to fit them in your week in SMALL portions.

Today we went grocery shopping and I bought the makings for a fruit salad.  Can't wait to make that tomorrow.  We love fruit salads.  Also bought myself some hard candy to suck on.  It helps when I am wanting something but don't really want the points.  5 jolly ranchers = 1 points and I can make those 5 jolly ranchers last a LONG time.  I also bought some M & M's and have already divided them into portion sizes in baggies.  Kept out just a few for this week and the rest we have put away for later.  Bill had a baggie tonight and he was surprised and satisfied with the amount, 1/4 cup = 1 serving.  Not bad.

Well next week is gonna be better.  Have lots on my plate to do and have a wonderful husband who will keep me on track.  Thanks for your support and love.  Later...K

Today has been one of the worse days since I started weight watchers.  I am so very tired, I have a headache & my knees hurt incredibly bad from the weather.  Doing any kind of exercise is out of the question.  I can hardly move.  I had to go out and about today and that was so difficult.  I will be so happy when bed time gets here tonight.  I have taken some pain medicine to help with the discomfot, hope it kicks in soon.

I never got around to making up meals over the weekend or yesterday.  Wish I had it would make having supper tonight so easy.  Guess I'll just have to grab a sandwich.  I didn't even have the energy to fix Bill supper so he just grabbed some food from McDonald's.  Praying for strength & energy tomorrow.  I need to get those meals cooked up. 

The rain is coming in tomorrow and will be here for the next week or so.  Maybe my knees will stop hurting once the pressure stops changing and settles out.  Spring break starts Friday afternoon and we have so much we want to get accomplised in a short time.  So looking forward to doing some physical work to help Bill with the repairs, etc around the house.

Well I'm gonna go get some food.  Catch you later...K

This has been such a day of 'news' for me.  I have had so much energy and got so much done.  I know that you are thinking why do the simpliest things seems to be so hard for her to do and she gets so excited when she does them.  Well think about this.  Imagine yourself 2 1/2 times heavier than your normal body weight.  Then think about yourself on your most tirest day where you just don't have any energy to go on.  Now try and live like that every day of your life.  That is what I have been living like for so many years.  No energy, no doing anything but sitting on a couch and being a bum.  Just to get up and go get a drink was work and I would have to sit down in the kitchen and catch my breath.  Now I can go from the office to the kitchen (opposite ends of the house), get my drink and walk back to the office without having to take a break....AND I'm not out of breath when I get back and sit down.  These little mile stones just make my day.  Now I am not saying that I can walk a long distance and not be out of breath because I still get that way but it's getting better every day.  It really is DAY BY DAY.  I can't plan for next week cause I am just trying to get through each day. 

When I used to do the laundry (before Bill took over) I would sit at the machines to sort and move the laundry on.  Now that I have taken back doing the laundry I WAS still sitting but today I actually stood there to move the laundry on and to hang up the permanent press.  It just made me feel so good to be able to do that.

There are things in my personal life that I don't want to share but just know that even those are getting better and I rejoice.

Today I sat outside with Bill for 2 hours and enjoyed the beautiful day.  I haven't done that since we first moved in.  It would be too hard to walk out there and then sit around and have to walk back inside so I wouldn't do it.  I would just stay in my chair in the house.  I so enjoyed being with him outside and as I sat there I was looking at the yard thinking,....I can help mow this lawn when it's time.  I know it will be tough to start with but I am excited about giving it a try.  In the past I wouldn't even get it a second thought. 

At supper tonight I told Bill he has to be strong for me over spring break.  I am so gonna want to go out to eat all the time, it's something we love to do, but I told him I don't want to.  Boston's Restaurant has all you can eat pizza on Tuesday nights and normally we can't go cause Bill is in school on Tuesday nights but over spring break he will be off.  I told him to please, please, please don't let us go there cause I would just eat and eat and eat that pizza and put back on the weight.  I have worked too hard to get these 13 pounds off, I am not about to put them back on.

We were gonna go to KFC and get one of those chicken pot pies but when I figured out how many points 1 was I said, nope we arne't doing that.  1 chicken pot pie is 21 points.  That's a lot.

So I am learning how to make better choices and be smart about what I eat and I am so happy.  Thanks for all your support and love.  Until later....K

Well it's official.  I weighed myself this morning and I finally got under 490.  I now weigh 489.  YEAH ME!!!!

Bill went grocery shopping yesterday and bought the makings for smoothies using bananas, strawberries, milk & yogurt.  He mixed one up this morning.  I am NOT a smoothie fan.  He didn't care for it either so I think we will figure something else out.

Last night I made hamburger pie and divided it up into 9 servings.  It was only 7 points per serving and 1 serving was enough.  Today I am gonna cook up some of my recipes for the week and then divide them up into per portion sizes so we will have something to eat for the week and won't have to figure out the points each time. 

I feel like things are really starting to come together and it's becoming a little easier to stay on this path.  I feel really happy about life. 

I know this is short but I am gonna run now.  Have lots to do today.  Enjoy life, you only get one chance to go through it.  Later.....

So it's Friday and that means date night and normally Bill & I stay at home, watch tv and have pizza.  Well tonight Bill saw an ad for the Ruben sandwich at Arby's and he wanted to try it so we went.  I am happy to say that I had a BLT in a whole wheat wrap and a salad instead of fries.  I did splurge and have the chocolate turnover for dessert.  The whole thing was really good and I am so pleased with my choices.  I don't feel 'overfull' like I normally do after having pizza.  In fact, I am a little on the hungry side and will go to bed like that.

I went to the doctor on Thursday and have officially lost 12 pounds since I was there back at the beginning of January.  It's been about 6 weeks now and I am so happy.  At the doctors office, with all my clothes on, I weighed 489.9.  I can't wait until Sunday rolls around and see how much I weigh at home.  The doctor was very pleased with my weight loss.  He said that you should lose about 2 pounds a week to be healthy.  We did talk about how many points I was allowed and how hard it is to eat that many.  He encouraged me to try and get that otherwise my body goes into starvation mode and it is harder to lose weight. 

My mom shared with me an article about heating coconut oil for health reasons and I think Bill and I are gonna try it.  There are a lot of benefits to it.  You are to eat 3 T. a day and we talked about making smoothes for breakfast with our yogurt and putting it in there.  So tomorrow when we go grocery shopping we will get all the ingredients and see how it goes. 

I have also come up with 4 recipes for meals over the next 2 weeks.  I am gonna make them up this weekend and then portion them out and freeze them.  We are gonna eat these 'dinner' meals for lunch Monday - Thursday since Bill is gone in the evening for dinner and then for dinner we will just have sandwiches.  I really hope it works, I am excited about giving it a try.  My husband is gonna be sick of chicken when I get through with these recipes but 3 of them are chicken and 1 is pork chops.  It is really hard to make meals out of ground beef and have them healthy I am discovering.  We always get 93/7 meat but our meals consist of spaghetti, tacos, lasagna, hamburger pie, etc.  Those meals are high in fat.  1 ounce of 93/7 meat is 1 point.  That is a lot compared to chicken.

I have had several people write to me saying how I am encouraging them.  How they are exercising more or watching what they eat.  They see me trying harder and it makes them try harder.  I am so happy that they are being encouraged.  Makes me want to work even harder so they won't give up.  So to those of you who I am talking about, and you know who you are, LET'S KEEP THIS THING GOING.  We will just keep encouraging each other and before you know it we will be healthier.

Hope you all have a happy and healthy weekend.  Later...K