So here it is Wednesday.  I weighed on Saturday and I didn't gain nor did I loose.  I still weigh 484.  That is still 18 pounds down from where I started. 

We went to Fredricksburg on Saturday and it was absolutely HORRIBLE.  It was 96 degrees, very crowded and no place to park.  I ended up dropping of Bill & his dad while they walked around and I sat in the truck.  There is no way I could have done all that walking in that heat with no shade and no place to sit.  So after about 90 minutes they were done looking around and we went to get something to eat.  That alone was it's own nightmare.  First I was driving around trying to find this German restaurant, then when I finally found it there was no place to park.  Had to find a place in the back of the restaurant and then ask these nice bikers if they could park the truck into this tight parking space, which they happily did.  The restaurant was PACKED so we ended up sitting outside under this canopy with misting fans blowing.  Bill & his dad got a table that I couldn't fit at and I was so embarassed trying to sit down.  I ended up crying and I could swear this table next to us was laughing at me.  I was so angry I just wanted to leave and I REFUSED to get anything to eat...until their food came and I was so hungry I ordered something off the kids menu.  I finally cooled down from sitting in the truck and got some food so I felt better but I was really upset over the hole thing.  I don't think I will do it again anytime in the future.  Maybe if it was winter time and not so many people.  I just don't like the heat and I don't like crowds.  Maybe I should move to Alaska. 

Bill's mom and family are coming in June and we are suppose to tour San Antonio.  I already told Bill I am gonna stay at the hotel while they go sight seeing and they can come back and pick me up.  It will have to be really cool that day in order for me to get out there and walk around.  I really think I could do the walking around if it wasn't so HOT.

I am afraid this week when I go to weigh in I will have gained some.  We have been eating and eating and I haven't done a very good job of watching.  On Sunday Bill's dad took us out to an all you can eat breakfast and although I only went through 1 time I still had fattening food.  This Sunday we are going to the Mother's Day brunch on post.  It's all you can eat and I am gonna have to carefully watch what I eat.  My stomach has hurt all week from the eating.  I haven't been eating my yogurt in the morning and I think that has a lot to do with it too.

We are headed to TN at the beginning of June.  I had hoped to be down to 470 by then but I don't think that is realistic.  If I could get down to 475 I would be happy.  The one thing Bill and I have decided about this trip is we aren't brining any 'snacks' in the truck with us.  If we want something to eat we will get it when we get gas.  In the past we would bring trail mix or crackers, etc and then end up eating all the way to TN.  Should be interesting.

My knees were hurting a little yesterday and the day before but we had a strong cold front come through and I think that was the cause, they don't hurt now.  Still haven't gotten in the pool.  If it's not one thing it's another that has prevented us.  Hopefully soon though.

I am keeping my hands busy by finding sewing crafts to do.  I find if I keep them busy I don't snack in between meals.  Which is a good thing but now I just need to watch what I eat at those meals, especially while company is here. 

Take care everyone...Later...K

So it's been a month since I blogged.  I stopped cause I didn't think anyway was reading them except my mom and I talk with her everyday.  So I am sorry to those of you who do read that I stopped.  I will keep it up cause I know that you are interested in my progress.

I have noticed that even though I haven't lost a 'ton' of weight that it is getting easier to walk and stand.  The last couple of weekends we have gone to the px, commissary, etc and shopped.  I surprised myself and my husband in how well I was getting around.  I wasn't out of breath nearly like I had been.  You know 4 months ago I wouldn't haven't been able to do what I have done.  It really makes me feel good.  Now don't get me wrong, I still have bad days but they are few and farther between.

As you know Bill has been doing most of the chores now for several years.  About the only thing was doing is the dishes and I would have to sit to do those.  Now I can do the laundry and that includes taking the basket from the bedroom to the garage and back after all the laundry is washed.  It really makes me feel so good to be able to do this. 

Yesterday we bought a new vacuum cleaner and of course we had to try it out last night.  Bill said you want me to vacuum and I said no, I want to give it a try.  I was like a kid at Christmas playing with there new toys.  I couldn't believe I was standing and running a vacuum.  Bill was grinning from ear to ear and after it was done I just had to call my kids and mom and tell them what I had done.

You are probably saying, why would you get so excited about doing this.  Well when you get as big as I am you get to a point where you physically can't do anything.  I remember watching this show several years ago and it featured this man who weighed over 1,000 pounds.  He took up the WHOLE bed, side to side, top to bottom.  He couldn't get up to use the bathroom, he would just go and then his wife or dad would clean him up.  They would bring him a BUCKET full of chicken and all the fixings and that would be his meal.  He couldn't even sit up to eat it, had to lay on his side.  He had bed sores from laying all the time.  When I watched that show I thought to myself, why would anyone do that to themselves.  How can you let yourself get that fat and that dependent on others for everything.  As I thought back on that show I realized I was doing excactly what he was doing.  I would ask people to bring me food, I would let them do the chores so I didn't have to.  I was turning out like him (except for the bathroom thing).  I was to a point in my life where getting up was difficult and I would rather just sit and ask people to get me what I wanted.  Now if I ask my husband to go get me something he tells me to get off my butt and get it myself and 9 times out of 10 I won't go get it cause I don't want to put the effort out.   At first I was so angry with him for doing this.  It made me so mad but now I know he is doing it for me and I love him for that. 

It's been 2 weeks now since I have had to take any pain meds because of the pain in my back and knees.  I didn't even realize it until yesterday that I hadn't taken any.  I also hardly take tylenol and motrin too.  You have to understand for me this is a big deal.  I was taking pain meds 3 to 4 times a day and in between those taking the other.  Now not to take any is wonderful.  My lower back hardly has any pain and my knees don't hurt.  When we would go grocery shopping I could hardly bend my knees and pull myself into the truck after we were done.  Now it's no effort at all.

Next month we are going to TN to visit and will be taking Addie to the zoo.  I am scared but excited at the same time.  All that walking makes me nervous but on the other hand I am excited to see how well I can do.  I know it will be tough but I NEED to do this to prove to myself that I have gotten over another hurdle.  I don't want to miss out of Addie's life. 

Thank you for your love and support and words of encouragement.  Please keep them coming and please keep me in your prayers.  When I have lost 30 pounds I get to go back to the doctor and reevaluate my meds that I take and hopefully we can start weening me down off the dosage and eventually off of them.

Today we are going to Fredricksburg, TN with Bill's dad.  It's gonna be HOT and it will be an effort but I am looking forward to seeing how well I do.  Until later......K